I do. Often I feel like I have done such bad things, sinned so much, been so far from where I should be, that its hopeless!
I sometimes believe that I cant keep on coming back to God asking forgiveness, asking Him for His mercy and His grace upon me, so its just over. My relationship with Him is long gone and I am in a big mess.
Have you felt this before?
I belong to a society which do online missionary work. We spread the good word of God over the net and online, but should I be doing this if I feel that I have sinned so much. Aren't I a disgrace to Gods work on earth. Who am I kidding?
At times like these, I try to go to the Bible and "make myself feel better". I take the life of Paul, He was a murderer, a sinner, Rapist and torturer. I haven't done any of these things. Paul was used powerfully in the Bible, He wrote 2/3 of the New Testament.
My point here is, Yes, Paul was saved, but did He carry on committing the same sin over and over and over again like I do. Did Paul murder, torture and rape after he was Saved? I doubt it.
So now I return back to my deep little thought pattern of how useless I am in Gods eyes. It is said somewhere n the Bible that we should confess, ask for forgiveness and REPENT. Repent means try not do it again. Most of the time, I am not trying to not do anything, in fact its just the normal old life for me!
You know what...WAKE UP!
Clearly I don't know who God is!!!!
It says in Psalms 103:12 - As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
One of the most effective tricks Satan plays on Christians is to convince us that our sins aren't really forgiven, despite the promise of God's Word. If we've truly received Jesus as Savior by faith, and still have that uneasy feeling wondering whether or not there is true forgiveness, that may be coming from demonic influences. Demons hate it when people are delivered from their grasp, and they try to plant seeds of doubt in our minds about the reality of our salvation. In his vast arsenal of tricks, one of Satan’s biggest tools is to constantly remind us of our past transgressions, and he uses those to prove that God couldn't possibly forgive or restore us. The devil's attacks make it a real challenge for us to simply rest in the promises of God and trust His love.
We are told in Matthew that our sins are forgiven and removed from existence and Christs memory. Peter asked Jesus how many times we should forgive those who sin against us, Jesus said 77 times. He didn't mean 77, He meant "many times".
But we cannot just keep on committing the same sin all the time and think all is great! (This is the part that bothers me so much).
As humans we will sin, but what do we do:
- Stop trying to overcome the sin yourself. Ask for Christ divine grace to overcome it
- You need to not want to fall into sin. This means having strong faith in God that His grace will help you overcome the devils tricks.
I need to get me head around all of this. Its difficult. I must admit that me faith has been slacking of late, but you know what...Gods grace is better! God uses all of us for some reason on earth!
He loves us! And all He expects in return, is that we accept and believe in Him!
Ain't He awesome...
And I have some serious praying to do!